


More than red

by Royaltae



Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Angst, I deal pain with more pain, M/M, Not 100 percent based on canon, angst angst angst, bad idea, have i mentioned, i can't see through my tears, i looped prayer x in my mind while writing this and, if you squint really hard there's some fluff, my memory is kinda fuzzy so there may be some errors, non-linear, sing as best mom 2k18, so slight spoilers for anime only fans?, takes place after vol 19 of the manga
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-09
Updated: 2018-12-09
Packaged: 2019-09-14 21:45:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16920975
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Royaltae/pseuds/Royaltae
Summary: Eiji looks dazed,fingers now curled tightly into his palms. He’s looking at the bunch of young boys,or not,but his mind is somewhere far;maybe somewhere in the past—of guns and knives,of running through the wind,of clandestine escapes,of harsh whispers and erratic hearts—Sing frowns a little.---Ash was only 17,still young and wild but never free,and he had already been through so much—had knew so much,had lived so much,even more than anyone else who had stayed on the soils of this cruel reality far longer. And Eiji could only wish,he wished and wished and wished,for him to be able to take Ash’s place—to protect him from all the danger of the world,to hide him somewhere safe so that he would never have to experience anything that he doesn’t want to anymore,to never let him hold a gun ever again,and for him to receive all the care and love he needed and deserved but never had.Set after vol 19 of the manga,non-linear plot





	More than red

**Author's Note:**

> I recently got into banana fish and it's the best and worst thing that has ever happened to me. Ash and eiji did not deserve any of this : (
> 
> Things to note:
> 
> -This fic takes place after vol 19 of the bf manga(after cough u kno what cough)
> 
> \- does not stick to 100% canon 
> 
> -kinda like an alternative to garden of light?
> 
> -this is very briefly proof read so pls ignore any grammatical errors or sentences that does not make any sense 
> 
> -present is in sing's pov and its in normal font whereas the past is in eiji's pov(well,the last one is more of ash's pov) and its in italics
> 
> -I love asheiji with all my heart and soul

 

  
「He felt everything getting larger and larger  
and then smaller and smaller.  
Then it got larger and larger and larger  
and then smaller and smaller.  
Then everything commenced to run faster and faster  
as when they speed up a cinematograph film.  
Then he was dead.」

 

 

* * *

 

 

  
Sing reaches over eiji’s shoulder to turn the gas off—the hungry flicker of the fire extinguished,leaving behind nothing but the linger of smoke rising off the pan and a distinct smell of burnt eggs.

“You’re spacing out again,”he chides softly,voice sounding more worried than sterned, when Eiji turns around and flashes him a sheepish smile. “Sorry.”

Sing pays no heed to the apology,ruffling his friend’s hair instead(a habit that he had picked up on ever since his growth spurt and with no fail always receives a groan of protest)and takes the pan off the stove to dump their breakfast straight into the bin. “You need to stop doing that,”he says with deep concern,then adds with a chuckle, “or you would soon run out of food to burn.”

“Hey,I don’t do that _all_ the time.”

Sing lets out a snort at that, “Hah! Sure,whatever you say chef Eiji~”

Eiji laughs a little at that,giving Sing a light smack on the back for good measures before walking off to make coffee for the both of them,most likely to make up for his failed attempt in cooking breakfast considering how Sing doesn’t like coffee as much. His taste buds are still those of a child after all,as much as he does not like to admit. _Especially_ to Eiji.

He watches his friend from the corner of his eye as he washes the pan,the _drip-drop drip-drop_ of the running tap filling the silence in the kitchen. He notes how the pale blue sweater drapes over his frame,swallowing him whole. How the sweatpants are being held by a tight knot and yet still threatens to fall. How the light in Eiji’s eyes,that used to be bright with pure joy,so full of life and always looks at everything that the world had offered like they were made out of magic and stars—are now dimmed and hooded and absolutely crestfallen.

And his smiles— _oh god his smiles_ —they were becoming more and more empty each day that sing feels _pained_ even by just looking at him. He felt like he was looking at a small,lost child who had no places to go nor dreams to follow. One who’s made up of nothing but broken shards and whose heart was taken along long ago by someone and is now just an empty shell who lives just because he has to.

Sing turns the tap off,picking up the cup of coffee Eiji had left for him on the counter and stares. He makes use of the momentary silence they share to gather his thoughts as well as to swallow down the lump throbbing in his throat.

“Uh hey,”he says finally,but his voice came out broken so he tries again. “Wanna go outside?”

He sinks his teeth onto his bottom lip nervously as Eiji looks at him in surprise. He fully expects a rejection and was about to take his offer back when the other places his cup down and smiles in understanding,and sing knows that eiji knows,why he’s asking in the first place. Silently,he breathes a sigh of relief.

“Where to?”

“I don’t know,anywhere really. A place to eat maybe? I mean,”he gestures towards the pan and the bin and laughs when eiji blows a raspberry at him.

“Sure. I’ll just...go get changed first? Yeah?”

Sing gives eiji’s forehead a playful flick, “Yeah,of course. Just hurry though,I’m starving.”

He receives a hard pinch on the nose in revenge before the other runs off,shouting“I’m taking my own sweet time!”

 

* * *

 

 

  
_Eiji reaches to turn the lamp on the nightstand on as soon as he heard the shifting of sheets followed by a soft gasp. He sits up on his bed and leans against the frame,waiting patiently for the pants to subside and for the other to collect himself._

_"Sorry,”came the soft,shaky whisper and Eiji turns to his right,eyes filled with care and concern when he sees Ash hunched over the pile of sheets,his shadow on the wall small and uncertain. “I woke you up,didn’t I?”_

_He chews the inside of his cheek,leaving his spot to kneel beside the other._

_Why are you apologizing?_

_“No,It’s fine,”he reassures,just like every other night that they had spent together like this,beside each other’s presence,breathing and alive with their hands tangled in a tight hold. It was one of the very few times of the day where they can both share a peaceful moment together,and Eiji wouldn’t trade it for the world._

_“I couldn’t fall asleep anyways.”he says,turning Ash’s hand around to draw circles on his palm._

_The other lets out a soft chuckle,tilting his head to watch the action,“That tickles.”_

_Eiji smiles in response and looks up to meet Ash’s eyes. The gentle glow of the light illuminating the room created a soft hue against his pale skin,hair looking even more yellow than it is—almost as if they were made up of pieces of the sun,and the loose strands that falls over his eyes were like a pond reflecting the specks of stars dotted across the night sky. An aurora light of its own._

_“I used to do this when my little sister was still afraid of the monsters under her bed,”Eiji says fondly. “She liked it a lot. Although,”he lets out a snicker, “her requests gets more ridiculous each time. She once requested for me to draw a dinosaur—on her palm! Can you believe that?”_

_Ash’s mouth curls into a small smile as he reaches over to tug Eiji’s hair behind his ear with his other hand—the one that’s not being tightly gripped on—then proceeds to gesture for him to sit beside him. Eiji does so wordlessly,covering them both with the wrinkled sheets._

_“Tell me about your sister.”_

_Upon the strange request,Eiji looks at Ash confusedly. “Are you that interested in her?”_

_Ash hums in response, “She’s your sister,no? Of course I would want to know more about your family.”he pauses,then turns to Eiji,slightly uncertain. “If you don’t mind,that is.” he adds. Eiji’s eyes widened for a short moment,before he started laughing softly._

_“It’s going to be a long story.”_

_Ash shifts closer to Eiji._

_“Anything to keep myself awake and entertained.”_

 

* * *

 

Chinatown is thankfully the least crowded on Tuesday mornings,making their walk to Chang Dai restaurant a peaceful one. With the new year coming up,the streets are aligned with numerous lanterns and firecrackers—causing the whole town to be drowned in a bright red,which sing had found out from the years of living with eiji,is the latter’s favourite color. He smiles fondly when he notices how Eiji’s fingers twitches at the sight of the well-decorated area.

“Should have brought along your camera huh,”he points out almost warily. Eiji smiles wistfully,eyes back onto the ground.

“It’s alright.”

He lets the subject drop as they walked in silence,with Sing leading them to the restaurant. It has been quite a long while since Sing had last visited Nadia,for most of the time he had was spent on playing the role as Eiji’s second mom.

The bells jiggle when Sing opens the door and before they could even take a single step inside,Nadia came running and gave them both a hug on her tiptoes.

“It has been such a long time,”she said,voice sounding fragile. Sing returns the hug tightly,mumbling an apology against her bare shoulder.

“We’re sorry for not visiting as often,”eiji voices the apology louder and Nadia shakes her head when they separate.

“It’s fine. It just gets a little lonely here sometimes.”

“Where’s Charlie?”

The restaurant is empty,save for one or two family,so Nadia leads them to a seat that has more than enough space for two people--one that’s beside a window that provides a clear view of the street outside.

“Oh,he’s busy with work again,”Nadia replies while rolling her eyes. “I’ll go prepare some tea and chow mien for the both of you.”

“Thanks,Nadia”

The woman waves the gratitude away,her jade earring(a present given to her by no doubt,Charlie)swaying and twirling as she turns to the kitchen.

As soon as they settle down onto their seats,Eiji’s eyes wanders off towards the sight of a near empty Chinatown,chin propped onto both palms. Sing follows his line of sight and his eyes lands onto a small group of teenage boys,squatting around in a circle outside of a closed traditional shop that sells handmade pineapple tarts,drawing random doodles onto the metal gate with crayons that are missing it's tip.

They were talking loudly(loud enough for the voices to even seep through the glass windows of the restaurant)to one another,pushing when someone draws something inappropriate,which follows with someone—most likely the more rational one of the group—to poorly cover the drawing with messy scribbles. Anyone with eyes would be able to tell that they are having fun. Young and wild. _Free._

Sing tears his eyes away to Eiji.

Eiji looks dazed,fingers now curled tightly into his palms. He’s looking at the bunch of young boys,or not,but his mind is somewhere far;maybe somewhere far into the past—of guns and knives,of running through the wind,of clandestine escapes,of harsh whispers and erratic hearts—

Sing frowns a little.

“They are kids who studies in the nearby school,” a voice says as cups and bowls of some herbal tea and chow mien are being placed onto the table. Sing blindly reaches for the chopsticks as Nadia pulls a stool to sit beside them.

“You know them?”he asks,voice muffled from the noodles in his mouth,kicking Eiji under the table when he notices the other still staring at the kids,unmoving.

“Some of them works part time here,”she says,fingers tracing over the patterns of the cup. “I do need the extra help,after all.”

Sing looks up at the longingness of her voice,quick to reach over to cover her shaking hands with his own when her eyes start to water.

“sorry”

“It’s okay”

“It’s just,”she rubs at her eyes. “I _miss_ him. A lot.”

Sing looks down at his own cup of tea,the reflection of a young boy with eyes full of admiration and the same amount of longing stares right back at him.

_Me too._

He turns to eiji,and realizes that he too has stopped eating(or if he had even started),bleary eyes now on the jade earring Nadia has on her ear.

“Even now, _so long after_ ,I still think about him,you know?”

_I know. I do too._

“I used to scold him a lot every time he breaks the plates,making him clean up all the broken shards scattered on the floor. And once he’s done,I would send him to sit outside of the shop to reflect. Now I miss that. No,I really regretted that. Maybe he _hated_ me then even,which eventually lead to him leaving…”she trails off,the tears that she had held back came trickling down,like a stopper that has been released.

Sing fights back against his own tears.

“Shorter doesn’t hate you,Nadia”he swallows the lump in his throat. “He always talks to us about you and brags about how...how he’s going to take over the restaurant one day. I don’t think he can ever hate you.”

Nadia smiles at that,grateful. Then,she laughs.

“He must have brought you guys so much trouble,didn’t he? I remember that he once went out with mismatched socks and shoes and he came back real quick with his face the reddest I have ever seen to change them!”

Sing responses with a smile. He remembered that. He had been the one who pointed out to shorter about his mistake after all.

“There’s also that one time where he had a cut so deep that he couldn’t stop screaming when I was tending to the wound. Or that time when he came back fully drenched because he had walked past someone who was watering their plants. Oh! And especially that time when he was with _Ash_ —”

She cuts herself off abruptly,hands reaching up to cover her mouth as if she had said something that shouldn’t have been told. Like blurting someone else’s secret,or like a sinful act done in the church.

“Oh my—I,I’m so sorry,”she stutters,reaching over to give Eiji a hug. “I didn’t mean t—”

“It’s alright.” Eiji says,voice suddenly cold and distant and lonely. “I’m okay”

But sing knows otherwise.

When Nadia leaves them to welcome the new customers,Sing ate in silence and Eiji continued to stare at his food.

He felt like he was eating with a ghost.

 

 

* * *

 

 

  
_“I wonder if there really is an end to all of this madness.”_

_Ash confesses one day as Eiji passes him his daily cup of coffee. He was researching on some information about the enemy on his computer. Eiji looks at him in confusion,walking back to sit on his bed._

_“why now of all times?”he asked._

_“It’s just,” Ash pulls his glasses off to rub at the bridge of his nose,swirling his chair around so that they are both facing each other. “things never seem to end–one problem after another,and another...makes me feel like I am in a never ending cycle,one that I can never get out of. To be able to live even just one day without fear..all seems too much like a fabricated lie—a laughable joke.”_

_Eiji’s eyes soften at the sight of how exhausted the other looked. Wrinkles were forming around his eyebrows and eye bags appeared darker each day,not showing any sign of disappearing any time soon._

_Ash was only 17,still young and wild but never free,and he had already been through so much—had knew so much,had lived so much,even more than anyone else who had stayed on the soils of this cruel reality far longer. And Eiji could only wish,he wished and wished and wished,for him to be able to take Ash’s place—to protect him from all the danger of the world,to hide him somewhere safe so that he would never have to experience anything that he doesn’t want to anymore,to never let him hold a gun ever again,and for him to receive all the care and love he needed and deserved but never had._

_“Oh Ash,”Eiji stood up and walked over to pull Ash into a tight hug. He heard the sound of the mug being placed onto the wooden desk before feeling arms circling around his waist,returning the hug with equal strength–if not,more–as if Eiji was going to disappear,slipping out of his grasp and never to return,had he not hold on tighter._

_“It’s all going to end,I’m sure of it. It’s difficult,I know.You of all people don’t deserve any of this. But I will be with you,forever and always–giving you support,holding you in my arms like now,to comfort you,to cry with you..and at the end of this hell,I’ll be right beside,laughing with you. I’ll be with you through all of this,thick and thin. I promised,didn’t I?”_

_Eiji feels his shirt turning wet with the other’s tears,but he doesn’t pull away. He lets Ash pours all of his feelings out,all of which he had to put away and keep hidden,never for anyone else to see. He lets him,no,wants him,to be the 17 year old he never got to be,someone who doesn’t live with fear,and someone who cries when they want to._

_“I really don’t deserve you,Eiji” Ash whispers softly against his chest,where his heart beats to reassure that he’s not just an illusion–that he’s still there with him,warm and solid and real._

_Eiji buries his face into Ash’s hair,smelling the faint scent of lemon as he closes his eyes in comfort,not minding the strands that tickled his cheeks. He needed to feel the same sense of reassurance as Ash,that he was still safe and alive and breathing._

_“You deserve everything that you want and need,Ash”_

_They stayed that way for a long while._

 

* * *

 

Eiji slips his shoes off messily as soon as they reached home,footsteps loud and heavy against the wooden floor as he rushes to his room. Sing chased after him and grabbed onto his shoulder to turn him around before he can shut the door on his face,hiding away yet again from the world and reality.

“You’re still not over him,”he said,sounding more like a statement than a question. Eiji is looking down,eyes refusing to meet his own as he reaches to remove Sing’s hand on his shoulder. But he doesn’t budge.

“I’m tired,Sing”Eiji tries to reason,but Sing’s not having any of that. He has been giving Eiji some space,understanding that he needs some time to be alone to sort out his thoughts and feelings properly. But Eiji’s doing none of that. Instead,he’s doing what Sing doesn’t want him to(and is afraid that he would)—he’s running away,thinking that if he doesn’t face the truth he would be fine,that none of those—that Ash’s _death_ ,didn’t happen. And Sing is tired of his mindset.

“We are talking about this now,Eiji”

“can’t this wait till tomorrow?”

“No”

“Please get out”

“No”

“Sing–”

“ _No_.” He says with finality.

Eiji lifts his head up,eyebrows drawn into a frown. “I don’t want to talk ab—”

“I’m _tired_ ,Eiji.” He cuts off,voice now sounding desperate and pleading. “I’m tired too. I’m tired of seeing you stuck in the past,ruining yourself..it pains me. A lot. And what hurts me even more is you hiding from the truth,pretending that nothing happened. It’s almost as if you are _regretting_ ever meeting Ash.”

Eiji inhales a sharp breath at that,eyes glowing with anger.

“I’m _not_!”He shouts,voice echoing within the walls. “I—I’m not regretting it. I,I don’t. I don’t. I never will–”

“ _Then don’t act like you do!_ ” Sing shouts back,reaching out another hand to hold onto Eiji firmly.

“Ash is _dead_ Eiji! That’s the truth you need to accept. I don’t want you running away from that any longer. So don’t act like you are living just because you have to. Don’t act like you are in this alone,because Nadia,Max,Jessica,Michael—heck, _me_. We’re all here for you. _With_ you.”

Tears are dripping from Eiji’s eyes at this point and he reaches to cover his face with his hand. “I’m–”

“I want you to be happy Eiji,” Sing says softly as he pulls the other against his chest,wrapping his arms around him in comfort. “I’m not asking you to forget about Ash. You don’t have to. He’s a part of your life–a part of you,and I wouldn’t try to force him out nor change that. But I want you to accept that he’s gone—and I know that it’s difficult— But I want you to accept that and move on,to live on and to live for _him_. You meant a lot to him Eiji,and I know he means a lot to you too. He wouldn’t bear to leave you if he wasn’t sure that you were safe and sound.”

Eiji remains silent,the room filled with his broken sobs as Sing rubs his hand against the other’s back in soothing circles.

“Live the way he wishes you to be. Return to being the Eiji he came to love and trust. I’m sure that he would want for you to be out here fulfilling your dreams and living your best life. The last thing he wants would be you despairing over him.”

Sing feels Eiji nods against his chest and he smiles.

He waits patiently for the other to calm down,whispering comforting words as he sways them a little in a lull. He releases Eiji when the sobbings stop,thumbing away the remaining tears that lingered around his eyes.

“You okay?”

Eiji nods once more. “Thank you,Sing”

Sing reaches over to ruffle Eiji’s hair.

“You’re welcome.”

He turns to leave the room,but was stopped when he felt the hem of his shirt being pulled.

“Can you….stay here?For tonight only?”

Sing’s mouth curls into a mischievous smile.

“Ash’s not going to like that.”

Eiji smacks his shoulder hard with a pout.

“Shut up.”

 

* * *

 

_By the time Ash returned,the sun was already starting to set._

_Eiji looks up from his spot on the window perch,smiling._

_“Welcome back”_

_Ash returns the smile tiredly,shrugging his jacket off before heading to sit beside Eiji._

_“Yeah”_

_They both sat in silence,bathed within the golden light. Eiji takes a peak at Ash,breathing a small sigh of relief at the sight._

_Ash looked peaceful—his face resting on a propped leg,eyes closed softly,the eye bags being drowned by the light. His hair dances freely in the air from the breeze,glistening,almost as if he himself was glowing,like he was the dawn itself._

_Eiji reaches for his hand that was dangling over his knee,slipping his fingers into the gaps. He smiles,not for the first time,at how well their hands fit._

_“Hey,Ash”he calls out gently._

_Ash slowly flutters his eyes open,beautiful emeralds looking up to meet his gaze. Eiji had always love those eyes. Ones that many had feared,comparing them to those of a demon’s. But Eiji knows better. Ash’s eyes had always been expressive,way more than anyone else’s. They were always swimming with immense grief and loneliness—a silent cry for help. For someone to save him. But no one ever saw them. No one except for Eiji._

_“Do you want to go somewhere together?”_

_“Like where?”_

_“Hmm,” Eiji closes his eyes in contemplation. “Like the supermarket maybe? We are running out of ingredients after all. Unless you are fine with eating natto everyday for breakfast..?”_

_Ash makes a face at that,“ugh hell no. Anything but that.”_

_“Even pumpkins?” He teases,mouth forming into a wide grin._

_“Eiji!”_

_Eiji laughs,giving Ash’s hand a squeeze. “I’m sorry.”_

_“You better be.”_

_He watches Ash shift around in his position,legs now crossed with the knees bent outwards—like one doing a prayer—as he leans against the window pane. He had looked so small and vulnerable,like his shadow on the wall when he wakes up from a nightmare. It’s at moments like this,when he’s not holding some sort of weapon,that he’s not Ash Lynx—not the ruthless criminal who everyone,even Ash himself,fears. No,he’s not. Maybe he never was,for ‘Ash Lynx’ was just an identity—a facade,to hide the lonely and lost boy he truly was. A boy named ‘Aslan’. Aslan who is scared of pumpkins. Aslan who teases and laughs. Aslan who cries._

_“Eiji.”_

_He snaps out of his thought,blinking a few times,and realizes that Ash is staring at him._

_“yeah?”_

_“Have you..”Ash looks away for a moment,hesitant,before reverting his gaze back at him. “Have you ever thought of what you want to do in the future?”_

_Eiji tilts his head at the unexpected question._

_“The future?”_

_“Yeah. When all this is officially over. When you can,”Ash clears his throat. “When you return to Japan. What are you planning to do?”_

_Oh._

_Eiji looks down at their tangled hands,unsure of how to answer the question._

_To be truthful,he had never thought about it. Never thought about what happens after he returns to Japan. Maybe somewhere deep down,he didn’t want to leave New York. No,he doesn’t want to leave New York. He doesn’t want to leave Ash. Call him selfish,but he had assumed that he would still be with Ash even after all the chaos ends. Fulfilling the forever that he had promised that night. But he knows Ash wouldn’t want that,as painful as it may be. Ash would want him to be safe,which would be back home in Japan. Selfless,selfless Ash._

_“Sorry,I asked a difficult question”_

_Eiji shakes his head._

_They will never know when’s the end. It could be tomorrow,the day after,or the one after. The future is so uncertain that they are both scared. So,so scared. That they might never see each other again._

_For that,eiji grips onto ash’s hand a little more tighter and decides to hang on to every little time they have left together._

 

* * *

 

 

The next morning,Sing wakes up to an empty cold spot beside him and the smell of pancakes.

He lets out a loud yawn,rubbing the tears and crusts out of his eyes. He doesn’t bother making the bed,instead moving out of the room and down the stairs to heed his groaning stomach’s pleas.

“Good morning Sing,” Eiji greets him,tiredness clear in his voice.

Sing returns the greeting,walking over to steal a pancake off the plate. Eiji only lets out a sigh at the action,for once not reaching out to smack his hand away.

As he takes huge bites of the pancake,chewing loud enough for the whole world to hear,he notices a book placed on the kitchen counter. He picks it up curiously.

 

_In our time  
-Ernest Hemingway_

 

“I didn’t take you as one who reads,”Sing says as Eiji passes him to place the stack of pancakes on top of the dining table.

“I don’t,”Eiji admits. “I found it hidden at the very back of the shelf and remembered that Ash gave that book to me.”He slips onto the chair. “He loved Hemingway’s works.”

Sing places the book down,joining Eiji at the table.

“Oh..knew that he’s smart and all but didn’t take him as someone who reads either.”

Eiji lets out a chuckle. “He reads a lot when he has the time. Even once snatched the newspaper away from me and told me to learn English by watching Sesame Street..can you believe that?”

Sing sputters at that,nearly choking on the pancake,“Hah! So Ash does _know_ how to make jokes.”

They finished their food in a comfortable silence after,and Eiji stood up to clear the table.

“So,what are you going to do now?” Sing asks as the other washes the dishes,arms crossed behind his head as he tilts the chair back so he balances on two of its legs.

“What do you mean?”

“You know what I mean. You can’t possibly just stay cooped up in this house for the rest of your life! No,”He shakes his head. “Even if you are going to,I won’t let you.”

“You worry too much,Sing”

He tilts back the chair and frowns slightly at Eiji. “And whose fault is that?”

“Mine,I guess,” Eiji admits guiltily. He dries his hands by rubbing them onto his pants before picking up the book. He walks back to the table and Sing watches confusedly as Eiji flips the book to a certain page and takes something out of it.

Sing takes the offered item into his hands,eyes widening when his brain finally processed what he had read.

“I’m going to submit the photos I took in New York and if they get approved,they will be displayed in this gallery.”

“wait— _seriously_!?” Sing exclaimed,standing up abruptly and causing the chair to fall from the impact.

Eiji rolls his eyes before breaking into a laugh,“I’m serious,Sing.”

“ _Woah_ ,this—oh, _oh my god_. I’m—” he reaches for both of Eiji’s hands,clutching onto them tightly as he stares into his eyes,his own teary.

“I’m so proud of you,Eiji. I really am.”

“I know. Thank you.”

Sing smiles,“Ash would be proud of you too. _So so proud_.”

Eiji smiles back.

“ _I know_.”

* * *

 

_“Ash,wake up!” Eiji shouts as he pulls on the blanket that Ash is rolled in,though to no avail because the latter has immense control over it. Eiji resorts to slapping his exposed back instead._

_“Wake up!”_

_Ash groans into the pillow,opening one tired eye to glare at Eiji. “What’s wrong..? It’s only,”he squints at the alarm clock. “11pm,Eiji. It’s literally in the middle of the night.”_

_“That’s why!”He screeches. “Hurry,we don’t have much time left!”_

_Ash startles at that,eyes blown wide opened as he reaches for his gun. “What’s happening? Is someone here? Are you hurt? Wh—”_

_“Wha–? Wait- Ash,you’re getting the wrong idea!”_

_Ash stops in his ramble,looking really confused as he lets Eiji take the gun away from him. “Then..what is it?”_

_“It’s—just,”he lets out a breath. “Just calm down and follow me.”_

_Ash follows after him wordlessly,leaving the dark of the room to step into the living room. There,on the dining table,lays a cake with one large candle sitting on the center of it,the fire wavering and flickering but strong and alive enough to not be extinguished. Ash turns to Eiji in confusion,but before he could open his mouth to ask,Eiji’s rushing him to the table._

_“Quick,it’s almost 11:11!”_

_11:11? The time in which wishes supposingly comes true?_

_They both sat down onto their chairs,Eiji is staring at the clock anxiously and Ash is still very confused._

 

_Tick-tock._

_  
Tick-tock._

_  
Tick-tock._

 

_  
He hears a gasp._

_“Quick! Make a wish!”_

_Eiji clasps his hands together in a praying motion,with Ash doing the same. He opens his eyes before Eiji,smiling a little when he noticed how hard the other’s wishing. His eyes are squeezed shut,eyebrows furrowed in concentration and his veins threaten to pop with the amount of strength he’s putting into his clasped hands._

_As soon as Eiji opens his eyes,he asks,“What’s all this for?”_

_Eiji grins,“today marks our 1st anniversary of being together.”_

_Ash blinks in confusion._

_“Is that anything important?”_

_“well well,just call it a tradition.” Eiji waves him off. “Anyways let’s blow the candle out before it melts. Do you want to do the honor?”_

_Ash lets out a chuckle,“Lets just both do it.”_

_“Are you sure? Don’t blame me if my breath smells like natto.”_

_“I’ll forgive you this once.”_

_They blow out the candle._

_“What did you wish for,Ash?”_

_“Hey now,you know what they say. Wishes won’t come true if you say them aloud.”_

_“I guess that’s true”_

_“Eiji.”_

_“Hm?”_

_“I’m really glad that I met you.”_

_“Yeah..me too.”_

 

* * *

 

「I’ll tell everyone in the world that 

you are the only one that matters」

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Both quotes are from Hemingway's book "In our time"
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> ahhhhhhhhhhh I'm very bad at angst but I hope you enjoyed reading! Thank you for reading through the end and do let me know what you guys think in the comments! See you next time :)
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> (P.s bf anime ep 22 absolutely ended me and I'm a complete mess. I don't know how I'm going to survive the last ep which is 40 goddamn minutes long..I love suffering)


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